Things One Should Not Do At Hogwarts
by Guardian of Night
Summary: Title possibly to change    The Title says it all. Please, enter, and laugh your heart out the farther I get into this.
1. Introduction

**(Note! There IS some writing in here...it's just way down THERE \/. XD Enjoy!)**

**Hello!**

**I have had an idea for some time to write a whole story on Fanfiction about the things we are NOT allowed to do at Hogwarts. Hopefully, you will enjoy this as much as I will, and, maybe, I might collaborate with my sister on some chapters. ^_^**

**Things you should expect:**

**OCs:****  
>Before each chapter, or even here, I will list the OC used and hisher description, background, and all necessary information.**

**Lots of Mischief:****  
>After all, that <strong>_**is **_**what the **_**LIST **_**is for…banning mischief? But we writers have**_**other**_**ideas… *waggles eyebrows***

**Many, many chapters.  
>I hope to do a lot of them, but will be skipping some, because I do not approve of their content.<strong>

**FUN!**

**I do intended for you to fully enjoy these. The**_**LIST is**_**all about laughter! :)**

**OTHER:  
>If there is a number related to the one above it, I might title that particular chapter differently… like,<br>Chapter _ Part One:  
>(and underneath)<strong>

**Number 99:**

**And then Chapter _, Part Two:  
>Number 100!<strong>

**So…yeah. :)**

**Things NOT to expect:**

**ALL NUMBERS:**

**I will NOT be doing all of the numbers, generally because of language or content. This will be, at its highest rating, a T.**

**LANGUAGE:**

**I do not approve of the language that is included in some, so, I shall either A) edit or B) skip it. I do not write in that style, as I do not believe it becoming.**

**BORING:  
>Some of these are <strong>_**so **_**dull! So I will probably skip those too. Haha. Or if I don't get them. ;)**

**I truly hope you enjoy reading these as much as I will writing them. I won't post every day, but I hope it will be semi-frequently. XD**

**Well, enjoy that little tid-bit of information, and hopefully I'll have a chapter out soon!**

**With pen in hand,  
>Shadow<strong>

"_**And lucky for you…I've got places to go, things to destroy…stuff to steal…ta!" ~**_**Eris, "the goddess of Discord"**_**, ~"**_**Sinbad: Legend of the Seven Seas".**

**And here's a tiny sample of my writing, to comply with Fanfiction's guidelines…**

(_**NOTENOTENOTE!**__–_I DON'T OWN ANY PART OF JK ROWLING'S WORK!_-__**NOTENOTE!)**_

**Several years from present day…**

It was a beautiful spring afternoon. The sun shone brightly on the magnificent grounds of the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and students could be seen heading to their next classes. It seemed like a completely normal day, except for one thing:

A young witch or wizard wearing a black cloak bent over to pick something up. In his or her hands was a piece of parchment with a lot of writing on it. The wind had blown the material across the grounds for years, and now, finally, it had found its way into the hands of a teenager, just as willing to create mischief as its former master. Across the top was written "_NOT TO BE USED AS A CHECKLIST!_" with a winking face beside it. There was no name, but it was obviously old…five or more years to be exact. He or she turned the parchment over in his or her hands, examining it, and then, with a slight smirk, the teenager chuckled.

"Indeed I _will_ use this as a checklist, Professor…"

For at the bottom was the signature of Professor McGonagall, and it was most definitely her handwriting at the top, too…well, except for the emoticon.

With a smile, the teen turned and, stuffing the paper into his or her bag, walked down the hill to Hagrid's hut for Care of Magical Creatures.

**(Author's Note)**

**Thank you for reading that! I hope you enjoyed, even though it is almost midnight and I am writing. I edited it, and, hopefully, it will be okay enough to snag me some more readers. IF you feel like it, review, but if not, I'll just go start digging my grave. Lol, just kidding! Do as you please!  
>~Ta!<strong>


	2. Chapter 1

**Hello! It's me, Night. :) **

**I have finally written a chapter for this fanfic! YAY! GO ME! *starts to applaud, but then blushes at self* Annnywaaay...O.o**

**Hopefully you'll enjoy this one. I had fun writing it, but feel that it could be better. Too bad I'm sickish, or else I'd spend forever on it. *sigh***

**Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER. JK ROWLING OWNS PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL AND THE WONDERFUL PLACE WE KNOW AS HOGWARTS. I OWN NOTHING BUT THE PLOT AND OCs. I ALSO OWN NO PART OF THE WIZARD OF OZ, NOR THE SONG "Ding, Dong, The Witch is Dead". **

**Please don't sue me...**

**Enjoy!  
><strong>-<strong>**-****-****-****

**The song "Ding Dong, The Witch is Dead" is never, ever appropriate**.**  
><strong>

My name is Robert Eugene Grayson.  
>I am 11 years old and just beginning my first year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.<br>I honestly don't know why I'm telling you this story. Maybe you'll follow in my footsteps. Who knows?  
>Oh, sorry. Forgive my manners. I realized you don't have any clue what I look like. Allow me to describe myself.<br>I have golden brown hair, which hangs shaggily across my forehead. My eyes are pale green, almost a chartreuse color. I have a few freckles which have been described as "splashed across the nose". Honestly, I don't care. But some girls (much older ones, to be precise) think they're cute. I think the girls are cute, but that's a whole 'nother story.  
>I was born in America, but when my father got a job in England, we moved. I still have an American accent, however. I don't know why. I was rather young when we moved. Ah, well. Guess I'll have to deal with sticking out of the crowd like a sore thumb.<br>I'm in Gryffindor house, by the way. Thank _goodness_ I didn't get planted in Slytherin or else I would have _died._ Who wants to be in that house of good-for-nothings? Ew. And Hufflepuff? I honestly think I would have just never showed up. The Heads of House say that each house has its own honorable qualities, but I just didn't want to be labeled immediately as a "loser" or "stuck up half-blood". Hah. Can you see me lounging around in Slytherin's common room, ordering food from the little house elves? Yeah. Neither can I. Although, I have to admit, it does sound fun. Heh.  
>I'm not all that tall. Not yet, anyway. My dad is six foot two, so I have a very good chance that I will tower over any future girlfriends. At least…if they're not, like, monster-sized. Boy I wish I could tell you about that one lady – but never mind that. It's a completely different memory, and I have a story to tell.<br>Honestly, I never had any intentions to come across as impertinent. True story! But sometimes it just slips out. It's always been like that.  
>Anyway. I was in Transfiguration class, with Professor McGonagall. It was early fall, right around the beginning of October, and the last class before lunch. You could tell the class was close to boredom, but they knew better than to hassle Professor McGonagall. She could whip out a deduction of house points in a heartbeat. We watched as with steady hands, she placed a toothpick in front of each of us, talking as she went.<br>I'll be honest with you from the get-go. I didn't really pay attention. So, unfortunately, I missed the lecture about how Transfiguration was going to help in life (And I would eventually regret that), and several other important facts. The only thing I got was how to turn the dreaded toothpick into a needle.  
>Unfortunately, I did <em>not<em> get the correct pronunciation. Oops.  
>So, when McGonagall came over to see how my partner, Darian, and I were doing, she was obviously not pleased with our progress.<br>"You have to say it _correctly, _Mr. Grayson," she told me in an annoyed voice. And so I waved my wand across the toothpick and barked out the words as best as I could, but I still got no transformation. I growled.  
>"Please, Mr. Grayson, contain yourself." Then, with a pointed look, Professor McGonagall turned to Darian.<br>Allow me to stop for a moment to describe him.  
>Darian is my age (of course), but he and I look quite different. He has very dark, chocolate brown hair and tanned skin. Very tanned! Like he spends all his free time out on a lounge chair in Florida. His eyes are an icy blue, which contrast greatly with his skin. They almost seem to pierce your through your soul when they meet your eyes. No wonder the girls get so giggly around him.<p>

His full name is Darian Michael Thomas, which, of course, I had to weasel out of him. He is a very…_studious_ kind of person, and though he can get an attitude, he's the sensible one of the two of us.  
>He's a pureblood. By this, I mean he has two magical parents. Very few people can say that about themselves, but you should have seen the Slytherins. They wanted to be friends with him on the train. Thank <em>goodness<em> he isn't that kind of guy.  
>"Mr. Thomas," Professor McGonagall pointed her wand at him to emphasize her words, "please show us the proper demonstration of this transfiguration."<br>One other thing. Darian's last name…most people might pronounce it like "tom-us", but that isn't how it's said. I remember so clearly when he corrected Professor McGonagall before the sorting. She almost fell over. Now _that_ was a sight to see. Anyway, it's pronounced "Toe-mahs". He gives a good death glare if you pronounce it wrong.  
>Anyway, Darian sat straight in his chair, pointed his wand at the toothpick, and spoke the correct incantation. As his wand jabbed at the toothpick, the wood transformed into metal, and then we were staring at a needle.<br>"Well done, Mr. Thomas," Professor McGonagall said. "Ten points to Gryffindor."  
>I thought I was well out of trouble, but nearly jumped when she turned to me. "You would do well, Mr. Grayson, to take notes from Mr. Thomas. I note that your toothpick is still wooden."<br>When she raised her eyebrows, I lowered my head. "Yes, Professor."  
>She raised one eyebrow at me and said, "Back to work."<br>As she moved to check on another of my classmates, I began humming and studying the pronunciation guide in my textbook. I raised my wand and was forming the words in my mind when Professor McGonagall spun around and gazed at me. "Mr. Grayson!"  
>I looked up. "What?"<br>"Detention, this evening, my office. 7:00 o'clock. And five points from Gryffindor." She rotated and strode back up to her desk.  
>I blinked, confused. What was the woman thinking?<br>I turned to see half the class staring at me, open-mouthed. "What?" I asked Darian. "What'd I do?"  
>"Dude," Darian began, and chuckled. "You have to <em>think<em> more. Do you realize what you were just humming?"

I thought for a moment, brows furrowing, and then saw his satisfied expression when my eyes widened. "Aw, no…"  
>I had been humming that song from the Wizard of Oz…you know…the one…that went, "Ding, Dong, the Witch is Dead!"<br>My face landed on my desk. "I didn't…"  
>"You did."<br>I opened one eye to look at Darian. "Man. I'm so busted."  
>He laughed and said, "Yep. You are."<br>I banged my head on the desk and didn't get up until after class was over.

I shuffled into Professor McGonagall's office at 7:00 on the nose. Honestly, I didn't have a clue as to why I was so stupid, but I guess it just came naturally. Haha.  
>I shut the door behind me, a little harder than necessarily, and winced as is <em>banged<em> shut.  
>Professor McGonagall looked up.<br>"Good evening, Mr. Grayson. Please sit."  
>I sighed and dropped my bag onto the ground beside my chair and sat.<br>She stood and came over to me with a sheet of paper and said, "You will need your quill."  
>I dug it out while she stood over me. I literally could feel the sweat dripping off my face as I rummaged for the thing. Finally when I straightened, she placed a piece of parchment onto the desk in front of me. "One hundred lines, Mr. Grayson," her mouth tightened into a straight line.<br>I nodded as she walked back to her desk, and then focused on the writing across the top.

The song "Ding Dong, The Witch is Dead" is never, ever appropriate**.**

I sighed and got to work.

****-****-****-****-****  
><strong>(AN)Well, there we are! :) I hope you enjoyed that. I'll try to have another one up soon. :)**

Review if you feel like it. :) I'm not going to be reduced to begging. :)  
>Also, please use constructive criticism. I really do appreciate help. :)<p>

**All right, bye, now!**


End file.
